Words of Wisdom: Our Progeny Reveals Who We Were
1. Better a dry morsel with quietness within than a house full of sacrifices with strife. 2. A servant who acts wisely shall rule over a son who causes shame and shall have part of the inheritance among the brothers. 3. A crucible (refining pot) is for silver, and the furnace (smelter) for gold, but the Lord tests hearts. 4. A wicked person (evildoer) gives heed to wicked (malicious) lips, and a liar (falsehood) gives an ear to a destructive tongue. 5. Whosoever mocks the poor taunts (rebukes) his Maker, and whosoever rejoices over calamities shall not go unpunished. 6. Children’s children are the crown of the elderly, and the glory (pride) of children are their fathers. Proverbs 17:1-6
If truth be told, our progeny (offspring) reflect who we were as parents. Children begin life as an empty sponge eager to sop up what they see and hear. Every child always looks to their parents as the guide for their life, even when the parent displays questionable behavior.
Sadly, this truth is easier to understand from the perspective of grandparenthood. The lasting impact of parents on their offspring is hard to grasp in the midst of raising our children. But, oh my, a grandparent’s perspective on this generational phenomenon is entirely different. So, whenever an elderly family member or close friend comes up and says, “You’re the spitting image of your father (or mother),” they may be referring to more than just appearance. Mannerisms, habits, and attitudes are learned and ingrained as children embody what they see and hear during their formative youth.
In simple terms: How parents choose to behave in front of their children matters. And, it is a choice. Every generation has the innate ability to alter their behavior and attitude as they mature. However, for many of us, the decision is not apparent until our children begin to exhibit traits that upset us. But, it is not until we recognize that our children are merely reflecting the mannerisms, habits, and attitudes we portrayed before them.
I wonder, does God allow us to catch a clear picture of our children’s likeness to stir within us a desire to change our destructive or malicious ways and attitudes? I believe, we all instinctively want to become a positive role model for our children? And we all pray in our hearts that our children will choose to behave rightly and not copy our faults.
Not only does God test our hearts, so do our children. God tests us to reveal our most significant needs of change. However, our children test our hearts to understand how they should behave and respond to others in this world. And it’s a fact: A wicked child will rejoice and take pride in being like his wicked father if that is all he sees from his father.
Grandparents have a decisive role to play in this cycle and afford a unique position and résumé of experience to identify their children in their grandchildren. So when, as parents, we get annoyed at our parents for seemingly butting in and giving us advice, understand they do it out of love, and often are trying to fix what they may have mistakenly left undone or unsaid when they reared the parent.
Let’s face it; God is our Maker. And, he wonderfully created each of us for his glory and purposes, but that does not mean we always may have done it right. God is also the author of “change.” We can choose to be transformed by God into what he intended from our birth. God likewise uses the gift of family to nurture the transformation process. Do not be angry when family members come to you and identify what they may see in us that may require change for the sake of our children or our children’s children. They are usually speaking out of the love of family! Our progeny reveals how we allowed God to transform us into his child.
Take time to scrutinize your children. See if you find yourself looking back. Does that produce a grin or a grimace? Is what you see pleasing to your heavenly Father? If so, your children should affirm that blessing through their actions and attitudes.
If you’d enjoy a Southern novel about small-town life dealing with the challenges and threats of 21st Century life, please visit my author page, T. M. Brown.